Imbolc

2-1-11 Welcome back the light

2-1-11 Welcome back the light

How is everyone? Are you surviving your cold dark winter nights and preparing for the return of the light? This is a special time called Imbolc, it is halfway between the winter and summer soltice, a time to welcome back the light...and that is exactly what I am doing.. So Thursday when I left off my driveway was plowed, and I was heading out to shovel a path and dig the car out so I could get to work the next day. It took me two sessions of 20 min each with my son's old boots on and plastic bags shoved inside but I did it! Snow filled my boots (didnt think of the duct tape till after) lol I then go out to test the drive way and turn my car facing down so I can go into the office the next day. I got halfway out and got stuck! Ugh! I called my son who refused to come over unless I paid him again so I hung up on him and I prayed.. Shortly after that a guy from CC called me and asked if I would sign a testimony for him regariding a court case some woman he had dated was taking him to court, well I knew her and how she had behaved at my house that night and I was more than willing to get the truth interjected so he said he'd come over and get my car unstuck....sadly though he got his car stuck also but he had AAA so a tow truck came and got us both out. In the meantime I listened to his troubles and gave his some guidance and encouragement and I also gave him a SpiritStone charged with energy to keep for court the next day, he really beamed and felt much better. Friday I went to the office so I could actually be warm for a bit and during the day they brought me 200 gals of oil (for $900!) ugh! and Shawn worked on the furnace. I stopped at the store got a few groceries and two red box movies and left my car at the bottom of the drive, I had tied plastic bags on my feet to get down there that morning and slipped much lugging down my computer so I left them off heading back up to the house. Shawn was gone so I called him, he said dont put the furnace above 55 and he would be back the next day to fix a few more things. So I had a bit warmer night and really was feeling happier. Sat morning I got up and made plans to go return my cable boxes and get the phone turned off, I really only need internet I decided. I also got the environmental survey filled out for the township and had to get that notarized. Shawn finished fixing the furnace and asked me for $100 when I asked how much the parts were ($30) I had thought he was doing the job for free but then I thought it's only right I give him something and that was less that if I had called a pro so I paid him. Times are hard but we gotta share with each other.  He's and old friend of my ex-husband and I wouldnt doupt if Gus wispered in his ear and sent him back in my life recently. Shawn lived with us before when I was married for an entire winter, he was out of work and slept in our living room, at first I was annoyed but then more than once he actually sat on my husband to keep him from hurting me when he was drunk, and when I had my nervous break down it was nice to not be alone all day, yup God sends angels to watch over you, don't fail to recognize them.... I ran my errands and then went to K-mart before heading home and ended up getting boots, I need them if I have to go out and shovel more, as more snow storms are predicted, and I also was thinking about Randy and how he had said he wanted to take me to Vermont with him when he went up for snowmobiling, I would need them for that if I went so I got a cheap pair. Driving home I got to thinking about him and how I bet he sure was enjoying all this snow, I said a prayer to keep him safe and I thought you know how can anyone love someone and NOT want them to go out and do what they love, what makes them happy, what makes them come alive. I thought about how much I value my freedom to come and go as I please now.... I got home and was happily approving all the members who were joing my new single and looking group and I saw that for now at least it is right that I am still single........and then I got a text....it was Randy asking if I could go to Vermont with him the next weekend! Yes I replied, thinking wow amazing how I left those meetups and events and this is what I get asked to do instead, and he called me at his lunch break and we made our plans.... I took a little nap then saturday afternoon and was woken up by my son, hey we came to sleep over in case it snows tonight.......what? No the heats off in your room, thats ok..but I have no cable TV...that's ok.....and no blankets....that's ok......yeah right they were staying there to help ME. Two days later they are still there, eating the food I bought for ONE so much for my canned cheese too.......now not only is my son back but I grew another too (his roomate) and now they are talking about moving with me to Keyport....I don't know how that's going to pan out but I am not going to worry about it... at least I have built in workers and there's more snow coming...... Sunday I went shopping and got a bathing suit to wear in the hot tub in Vermont, and I did my walking event too... met a very nice gal who not only is a massage therapist and Reiki master she lives in the town that I am moving to! Not just the town but the exact neighborhood I want to move to! I don't care what pepople say and accuse me of moving there for Randy I know in my heart I am meant to move to that town........and when I offered her a SpiritStone you know what she did? She took it, charged it with energy and she gave it back to me! And she reminded me to do self reiki, she could sense the hard times I have been going through, the drain on my energy, she said she had some great material on boudary setting if I wanted it. Oh yes yes I said that's been a hard one for me recently, I told her sometimes its so hard to shake some off i have to get em mad at me to break free..... Oh things are really looking up and as we sat there after our mall walk we planned for spring and outdoors and we commented on how it was staying light outside longer.....  Today I want you to welcome back the light in your lives, till your fields and prepare to plant the new seeds, do your spring cleaning in your home and in your life.....spring will come again and oh what a glorious time we will all have! Look around and see the signs of new life that has already started and thank whatever god you know for that, the cirlce of life is a miracle of re-birth not to be taken for granted..... With Love and in the Light,  Cassie  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imbolc Imbolc http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eH7okeqtY3o

Outlaw Poet heading towards the light..

Timothy Johnson 
i held it all in.looking for grace.god knows i tried.as my soul slowly died.now looking back.i see your wounded wings.had never known love.you just couldnt fly.you may see.so little in yourself.know love is out there.but you have to try.i may not know.who you really are.for your world colored with pain.i forgive you good bye.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson 
my door is always open my friend.i know you are lonely on your mountain top.and your life so cold from so little sunshine.below people talk and say so little.so dont worry if they dont call your name.rest your weary soul and you'll be fine.give your love to the skys.rest your love by my side.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson 
if i become weak.will you give me strength.would you want to know.where my problems begin.would you stand with me.no matter what the length.if i give you my love.will it be safe in your heart..if i lose my way.will you help me see.when summers turn to winters.will your new year be with me.as our love grows stronger.in us will you still believe.if i give you my love.will it be safe in your heart....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson 
ive been knocking.standing in the cold.outside your door.i know youre home.ive got something to say.wont you let me come in.dont hide away.girl look at me.see in my eyes.open your mind.to someones who here.come on let love begin.wont you let me come in.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson remember us in the twilights glow.in a time we touched the skies.on the shores of our sea of love..dance with me in your dreams.lets hold each other one more time.it was only you i was thinking of..hide from me if you think you must.dances in the twilight will never end.for god gave us his kind of love..remember us in the twilights glow.in a time we touched the skies.on the shores of our sea of love...the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson
leaving nowhere to somewhere..with a song..wanna tag along?..taking reservations baby..all night long..heading towards the the light..no need of clothes..where lovers go..baby youd be the star..of our show....fast ride to a slow place..where love calls home..no stops along the way......the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson

its been awhile.since i heard a love song.thinking it was playing for me.seems like someone else.whose heart danced so in love.now its hard to believe.im beginning to love again.its been hard.telling my heart to hold on.knowing memories may be all thats left.seems like a movie.me an actor on her stage.then you and the very best.im beginning to love again.in her eyes i see more then a friend....the outlaw poet

Foreigner - Cold as Ice 2008

1-27-11 Losing Branches

1-27-11  Losing Branches As I write my blog today I am sitting here in a land coverd in ice and snow, the scenery is lovely but the cold is awful! It's a pretty scene but there are many dangers, not all will survive... I am so looking forward to spring...but first a bit more winter for us all... So Saturday I wake up and laze around my clean house and then decide to go grocery shopping. I was really enjoying picking out just what I wanted to eat for the coming week instead of trying to find what would be enough to keep my son fed the whole week and something would be left for me also! LOL I went up and down the isles enjoying myself, got one of those little one egg frying pans also and then I saw the canned cheese, now this is something a bit expensive (to me)  unless its on sale and also something that no matter how many cans I buy I venture to guess it's been over 10 years since I actually got to eat any of it. I am convinced my boys both had canned cheese radar and squirrled it away before the rest of the groceries were even un-packed. But anyway this day I happily put the can in my cart, with my reduced fat triscuts and looked forward to being able to have some one evening as a snack.....my phone rang and it was Jeremy calling to say he'd come do some work if i picked him. Hungy I bet he is I thought to myself and picked us each up a subway sandwich....guess what he put on it when I wasn't looking? Yup, at least 1/2 the can of cheese! Dang it! Well next can I get to eat... LOL I kept hoping Randy would text and let me know if he was coming up, but by 3 pm I hadn't heard from him. I was driving my son home and talking to him of his ex-girlfriend issues and I gave him some advice and then I said how even I act crazy, that I had broken up with and went back to Randy a dozen times since the summer. It was at that moment I realized that man must love me and I decied to text him to see if he was coming, I waited 2hrs and then headed out to see No Strings Attached, just before the movie started he texted that he'd be there at 7:30, good I said moive gets out at 7:15....however he arrived before me but let me tell you it's really nice to go out to see a romantic movie and come home on a cold winter night and find a warm man waiting for you. We had a nice time, no bringing up bad subjects, I told him of my house buying woes and he told me of his snowmobiling. He said he had driven over and checked out the new house and he said he can come over on bike and park in back. I have pretty much decided to put up with this, seeing him when I can. I figure I got more work to do as a single person and he got to let her stay a bit longer and I am still going to date whoever asks me....he did ask me to go to Vermont with him so I said yes but I can only afford my meals. He said great he'd let me know when... Sunday I had a walking event and had a lovely time. One of my long time friends said she was glad to get a chance to talk to me as other events I am surrounded by people, and one in particular is not nice and says all the seats are taken. I must say that info factored into a descion I made two days later....and that was to clear off some branches and make room for new growth. But anyway I was happy and hopefull and making plans for spring walking trips. Then I came home and the cold hard reality of winter was not just at my door it was in my house! I had run out of Oil! I knew it was low when Jeremy checked it and had planned to order some monday. I called and they wanted a ton of cash to come out for emergency delivery so I went to Walmart and bought 2 space heaters for a third the cost of the emergency delivery. Monday was work and dealing with meetup stuff and calling for fuel, seems they couldn't deliver till thursday! That is today but my driveway is covered in 3 feet of snow! I called and they said I'd have to wait another week when I asked them to come out after noon....once the snow plow came. I argued I was 1/4 mile from the place and they were firm till I started crying on the phone! I just don't think I could go another week w/o heat and I have no cable TV to boot! I really am going through some long dark nights over here....but I am keeping the faith and knowing that spring will come, it always does come... Tuesday and Wednesday were also spent on some social network drama, it got so bad that I just walked away from it all. It's amazing how people will start getting controlling and bossy and fearful and all sorts of other things when money is involved and finances are tight. Anyone can be a friend in good times but its how they treat you in the bad ones that really counts, even the best of people get hard to deal with when thier fear button is pushed. The important thing is to get away from that when it happens and don't get dragged into it. I wish I could say I walked away soon enough on this one but I didn't, words were said, I still have that need to defend myself and its something else I need to look at. But that's the good thing about hard times, it shows us what we need to work on. So today I sit here a winter wonderland coverd in snow, freezing my behind off and only have internet to entertain me. At least I can do my job from home, work on the new meetup groups I bought and are going to build from scratch with fresh new faces and no old dead wood, and I have netflix.....thank god for netfix! Curse you suburban propane! LOL The plow just came I must go out and shovel the car out..... Today I want you to take a look at the dead branches in your life, or the ones barely alive, the ones that don't produce any fruit for shade and see if you can stir up a nice storm and shake them off.... Take your cue from nature and know that in order for new life to grow old dead life must be removed, just as ice clings to trees and breaks off the dead branches so must you do the same in your life..........this cold dark night of my life will be ending with the spring thaw and I will be transplanted in a new place. I am getting rid of my dead branches...what about you??? With Love and in the Light,  Cassie Foreigner - Cold as Ice http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQaCy2lgb0I PS: I forgot to add my gratitudes in this blog and I have several I am greatful for my son and his roomate who came over and shoved me out on wednesday, the $20 each and the lunch I bought them was worth it I am greatful that last week I heard from Shawn my ex-husbands best friend because he needed help posting an event because he came to help work on my furnace I am greatful for my meetup member who is getting taken to court by his crazy ex and called me late last night because he needs me to sign a testimony for him, he is coming over tonight for that signature and bringing rock salt to get my car unstuck from the driveway I am greatful that my house did not close the end of Jan as predicted because there's just way too much snow on the ground and my pack rat would be too hard to get out.

Outlaw Poet still yearning for his love like I am....

Timothy Johnsonin your dreams feel my love.it is living in your heart.my lady it is where love starts.for we will never part.all you have to do is live your dream.its easy if you try..in your dreams feel my touch.you are all that i can see.we can hold hands by the beach.the sea is there for you and me.all you have to do is dream of us.its easy if you try......the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnsonrest your head..gently on my chest..feel my heart beat..feel two hearts beating as one..feel our bodies..entertwined in warmth..feel our rhthem of love..two together becoming one..celebrate our love..slow dancing in our souls..hearts kissing with passion..feel soulmates who forever are one.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson sweet lady in your dreams..fly and be free..just make extra room..in your heart..for my love my soul my dreams..will be flying with you..and you gotta hold them..for you know its your love..that gives them life.......the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson a moment in time with you..is all i ask of forever..call it my dreams my wish my fantasy..for of you they are all true..others may have taken you for granted..the joy of simply being with you..i wouldnt care about a tomorrow..if today was a moment in time with you....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson my beautiful lady..dont worry about a thing..just close your eyes..and lean on me..rest your weary soul..take all the time you need..leave your troubles at my door..let me be strong..find your serenity and peace..my beautiful lady..ill always be there for you..my beautiful lady..loving you is all i want to do........the outlaw poet.....come to me

Timothy Johnson meet me where the hearts cross.down past the house of dreams.there will be white doves up in the air.guitars playing love songs everywhere.meet me in forever.its where we'll be together.in love forever.meet me where the rivers dance.dancing partners are shooting stars.its where the world seems to end.on the path where love begins.meet me in forever.its where we'll be together.in love forever...the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson as you walk in peace.amongst the winter trees.breath in the air.as our hearts share.the time of our life.we cant let pass by.this is our season.love is the reason.as you look at me.we are as leaves on trees.never whole apart.together one beating heart.everyday ill say i do.im so in love with you....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnsonshould tomorrow come without me.go on living like youve never lived before.kiss the sunshine in the morning.follow the light through every open door.marvel at the sparrows as they fly.through blue skys of endless dreams.listen to the songs they are singing.swim gently in the water of lifes streams.should tomorrow come without me.feel the wind and know im free...the outlaw poet

now i am worried about snowmobile accidents..........

the outlaw poet....seems to be losing his fears..

Timothy Johnson
witches biker chicks and new age hippies..have all settled in..no clothes no worries in sight..singing along hand in hand..dancing with the charlie daniels band..being as free as they can..feeling the pleasures of an outlaw band..dont stop dancing..lets dance......the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson

walk with me.leave those troubles behind.there is a river.flowing in the mountains.where you can swim free.ill take you there.walk with me..yesterdays dont need to come.i know of a place.where the moon will dance.for just you and i.ill take you there.walk with me.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson
IF i open my eyes.will i see.what my heart already knows.that my path to love.leads to you.its where i should go IF i talked to my soul.would i feel.warm breezes in the snow.would just your touch.be the key.to let our love grow IF i gave my all.to loving you.my dreams would be alive.heart to heart.we'd do loves dance.for the rest of our life.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnsona gentle breeze was blowing.through some old georgia pines.one could almost hear the whispers.from a rainbow across the sky.sunshine was holding everyones hand.playing as two deer pranced by.the stage was set for natures band.when my heart felt my outlaw princess.say poet will you dance with me.will you dance with me.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson i saw her in the shade beneath a tree.she looked at me and came running.her hair blowing free like the wind.whispering that i was her only one.she said we'd ride away together.or i wasnt going to ride at all.saying nothing could replace my heart.and my name was all she'd call.my heart was born that day.she took away my fears.she wanted the outlaw me.....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson

dont you feel my heart..tugging on you at night..ive told it to stay away..i dont know what else to say..so with you it wont stay..talk to my heart..how do you tell a heart..its not loved anymore......the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson a thin tank top.getting tanned in the breeze.muscle engines roaring.their vibrations through the seat.yes the sky is clear.and the roads are free.my lady its time to ride.making love all night.an outlaw princess.being caressed by the sea.holding on smiling.no better place to be.she whispers softly.in us i believe.my lady its time to ride.making love all night....the outlaw poet

Timothy Johnson

i see her standing in the moonlight.her eyes sparkling like the stars.her heart glows so warm and gentle.and all my world feels so right.i dance with her in my dreams.a slow dance to a love song.with music knowing no space or time.more beauty then ive seen.i see her with my heart.its where love starts....the outlaw poet....ps now if she only sees me