1-17-11 Really Could Use a Cowboy Right Now

1-17-11  Really Could Use a Cowboy Right Now

So Friday night I headed down to The Starland Ballroom to pass out the tickets to the 70's concert that AnnMarie had contacted the place in our behalf and they sent us 500 tickets! We were in shock but it sure helped us grow the new Social-Cirlces group. I was tired though, and its a long drive and I was so not into it but I had made the commitment. 287 was backed up and Deb called and she said yes I wondered why you wanted to move down the shore and face that everyday and I said I am called to. I did end up tossing out about 3 SpiritStones as I drove the route, I had been told before to do this, to relive the tension of that area and bring good energy to it. I can't tell you how many people pass that way on their daily commutes and how many accidents happen there, the energy must be very negative with all those angry commuters backed up day after day leaving that imprint. Yes this is an area who can use some of the good energy, I will "seed" the area each time I pass there....

Saturday Jeremy and I went to see Deb and drop off my carpet shampooer for her, she had bought us lunch and out did herself. I keep trying to give to her to pay back her generosity to me and she gives more each time! I am going to go pick her up at the airport on Friday so that's one way I can give back. Its very important to give back when you receive from others, the flow of energy is important for all. I was glad to be there to visit with her too as she just got let down by yet another man. In the evening I was doing a dance event with my friend Tina for her favorite band, she asked for my help and I said I would do it and see how many bodies I could get them and maybe in the future get a cut for bringing people in and she said sure. It was a great band and I did get them 50 people and we all danced and mingled and had fun, I got to see some people who I hadn't seen in a long time who had come to my BBQs years ago. I also talked to one of the guys whom I had met before who kindly bought me a drink and we discussed dating in general, he gave me some insights to add to my fourm on CC Advice from the field Men for Women which I think can help all of us single women. It's tough out here in single land, 4 women to every man, we need every edge we can get....

Sunday was my Improv class that is taught by my good friend Anthony. I was pleased with how many people came and the participation too! Some of the shy one's really got up there and acted and let stuff out it was great! Anthony reads and follows spiritual principals such as I do and really likes to use Improv to help relationships as well. I am very excited about the work he is going to be doing to help the members of CassiesCalendar and the meetups AnnMarie shares with me. On the way home I had an organizers dinner meeting with Debbie and AnnMarie. We discussed how we would share the groups and the events and work together. We discussed problem members and how they take away from the spirit of what we wish to create and resulting of that I did end up having to remove an old friend and past business partner today. I have lost a great deal of money due to him and he has remained belligerent and controlling , the business website had come up for re-newal and I had to let it expire because he is holding onto all the product  I paid for and couldn't fulfill orders. Oddly enough it expired on 1-11-11. So onto new things, as i said I am going to soar this year and not let any turkeys hold me back! If anyone's meant to soar with me they will get their wings and catch up.....

So as you can see a very busy weekend for me, I am exhausted! Oddly enough I had gotten a quick reading from my tarot guy online Sunday morning, he told me I am going to only read you for a month instead of the usual 6 as I know you won't wait. He predicted a loss in a  week (and I did find out my tenant is moving next weekend w/o giving notice), he also predicted a move for me in 3-4 weeks (I found out that they are going to take my offer on the house down the street but NOT let me rent, I must wait till closing). He also brought up Randy and pulled the tower, said he was terrified of shaking up his home situation, wow tell me something I don't know I thought. Then I started thinking about him again, I knew he was in Vermont, had hoped when he was away from them and alone he'd call or text or send a picture at least but he did not. I worried about his safety on the trails but I didn't text to check on him, he told me to not contact him and I am going to respect that. I kept reading The Outlaw Poet and finally decided to stop thinking those poems related to him, even if they did they all talk of love in the future, I need a man NOW, I am going to give up reading those, who wants an Outlaw anyway? I need a cowboy.......

Currently I sit here also wondering where my son is, he didn't come home last night and is not answering texts or calls all day. I called all his friends and the hospital and finally filed a missing persons report. They checked the jails so he's not arrested, not in NJ anyway. I got a feeling he's gone out partying or something with that ex-GF who stole my car.......don't seem to matter what I do with him he falls back into depression and thinking his life is worthless. Times like this always get me to crying and feeling bad for him growing up with out a father....when Gus went to jail he was 6 he begged me every day to get him a new father....Big Brothers program never had anybody for him.....the only serious boyfriend I ever had was Randy and he was thrilled to death over him--told his friends my mom picked out a guy for me! But despite the fact that he promised on several occasions Randy never did take him snowmobiling, and only once did he take him quadding.....he had a guy friend with kids at the time and went with them all the time, too dang selfish to see how badly my son needed a pal..........yes where have all the cowboys gone?

Tonight I am tired, weary to the bone, sick and tired of working so hard, waiting for love, praying for people to behave and have respect for one another, for women to be honored and not abused, for sons to have fathers , for daughters to have daddies, for lazy people to get off their selfish self-entitled asses and get to work instead of laying around in self indulgence with their hands out......yes it's not a good night for me and I just can't think about it anymore, I'll think about it tomorrow...........

Say a prayer of two for me, and for us all........

With Love and in the Light, Cassie

Paula Cole-Where have all the cowboys gone 
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPR108kwNo4