12-13-10 Trusting the Bridge

12-13-10    Trusting the Bridge So Friday night since John didn't have time for a date Jeremy and I went to Walmart, he had needed a ride to cash his paycheck and we needed groceries. I was going down the aisle when a guy came up and said Hi Cassie and started talking to me, someone I totally didn't know at all! He then said oh that's right you don't know me but I know you and he told me how he has been a CassiesCalendar follower for years and had always wanted to meet me. He said funniest thing but a voice inside him had told him he was going to meet me at Walmart this night! Weird right? I wish the voice had told me so I could have put some make-up and something other than a jogging-suit on before I headed out (remember Friday is my work from home day) LOL We had a brief conversation and he was disappointed to know I was not going on the 40 mile bike ride the next day that I had posted....join my calendar and you will get the newsletter telling you what events I will attend I told him.See I knew my readership is at least twice of who has actually registered! Saturday I did some shopping and then I stayed home, Jeremy was home and we ordered pizza and he actually paid for half! I was so happy! Maybe that boy is learning some responsibility. He's been home every night too and sober, staying out of trouble...if this keeps up I won't mind if he does end up going with me when I move. I got really bored though and posted and ad on CraigsList, met one nice guy who wasn't too bad looking and we e-mailed all night, till I got to the point of well someday when we meet.....and *poof* he was gone! I stayed home Sunday too, did a bit of shopping, picked up a couple red-box movies and headed home. Jeremy went to work and came home early, grumbled something at me and went to his room. I landed another craigslist guy and he called and talked to me for a bit. Real friendly guy, lives about 30 min south of where I am moving to, said he hates driving though except in the summer he rides his Harley around so I told him well I will put you on the back burner for now and in the summer ride up and see me. LOL  I also paid all my bills on Sunday and took a look at what my deposit looks like now that they are taking out the loan payback--- pretty pathetic I went to bed praying for a good offer on my house the next day, enough to pay off my credit cards and maybe even my car.....I promised to not worry and my voice said all will be well.... Monday morning the card I drew was Trust, and I must say I am going to have to practice that one to my fullest potential! My realtor and I went to meet with the township and they made the offer. It was really more of an insult, especially with how they led up to it by saying what a lovely piece of property it is, how there's no other public access to the river in this township, the historical value yadda yadda.....and then they said that due to it being Green Acers Fund money they can't offer me any more than the appraisal...which was just enough to cover my current mortgage, the realtor fees (at a reduced rate) and leave me a very small amount, an amount so small that if I had not borrowed on my 401k I wouldn't have enough for a new down payment on even that small house cheap grey house that I found. I cried, I really cried right there in front of the township committee...but then I pulled myself together and said ok. What choice did I have? I had a choice 3 yrs ago to take nearly double this offer and I said no because I had only listed the house because Randy and I were going to sell ours and get one together but we had just broken up, and instead of him coming to ask me to marry him he went off and found another chick, took her on his motorcycle to Vermont and sent me a picture of them. I was too devastated back then to take that offer and this is what I was faced with now..nope this was my only choice and I had to take it and make the best of it.. I signed the papers and I bucked up and I said to myself it was a miracle that I held onto this house all this time, more miracles will happen....so I came home and went to work on my new business venture for CassiesCalendar and the spin off we are making Social-Cirlces and was happy to find out AnnMarie got us FREE concert tickets for The Starland Ballroom, right near where I am movint to! And For a really kewl Led Zeppelin and other 70's bands tribute concert. Yep we got something going on here now, I can do this I can make it and then my son came downstairs and I told him the news and that he better get on the ball as I would be leaving soon and he'd be in bad shape if he didn't get out looking for a place and making some plans.....and then he dropped his bomb..... He lost his job. I just took a deep breath and let him walk away..... But I talked to Mary and I got my courage back and my momentum because that's what single mom's have to do and I went up to get him to go get his new phone fixed... I was able to get a new phone for free for him, then we went and picked up taco bell for dinner and I gave him the lecture the well this was just a stepping stone job anyway, any I ever lost I ended up with a better job (its true too) and you know you needed to move on and you never would have left there any other way and he agreed. So now he's got to decide if he wants to try and get assistance for housing and stay here or go with me, and that's his choice to make, but some how I believe this "bad" thing did happen for a good reason right now......trust is needed...trust and courage and I have to teach him how to have it when I am on the verge of losing mine. But it's not the first time I been in tough spots I can do this.....God never let me down before why would he now.... so I sent Mike the paper work and told him to see if this is enough finally to satisfy the man in the grey house so that I can move in. How about you? How are things going for you in your life right now? Is the going tough? It is for most of us these days, but the key to how we end up is trust and faith. We can hang on and keep going, and what looks to be a rickety old bridge just may end up being your stairway to a heaven, a new Begining ........just keep going, trust in your god and DON"T LOOK DOWN!!!! With Love and in The Light, Cassie Led Zeppelin - Stairway To Heaven http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcL---4xQYA