10-25-10 Nesting

10-25-10 Nesting

Saturday night I went alone to see the movie Paranormal Activity 2 and then I had to come home to my house ALONE because my son was at work (nightshift). Halfway through the movie I realized this probably wasn't the best of plans but there I was and I had to stay to the end! LOL But for one thing this movie was not about ghosts and for two I felt my little voice say to me "greater is he that is within you" and I didn't at all feel scared after that! Try it sometime!

Saturday night I talked to Mary for a bit, I was so upset after having talking to my selling realtor when I called to tell her about the letter I got from the township. She like everyone else keeps telling me how I need to face reality and take a very small price for this house and just walk away. I keep getting messages that I belong in that hosue on Sunset and I know that my home and property have a greater value than this, they dont comp it out right. I told her why is it that when you try to have faith in your still small voice everyone comes to try and knock it down? No one believes like I do that I am going to be succesful with this sale or with Randy. They keep saying face reality face reality...well when reality shows up on my door step thats when I am going to face it, until then I am going to keep the faith and believe.....

Sunday I was thinking of going to Improv practice but Mary called and she hasnt been well lately so I decided to meet her for breakfast and take her an Inspiritistone with some healing energy intention and do an angel card reading for her. While there I sent her the picture that Randy had taken of the house on Sunset to show me that it was still vacant. I asked her to "read" it and she said the house was sad because it was vacant for so long, and I said (they bought it in Jan), she said it was happy for it's face lift (they had just re-done the whole place) that the old owners had left crying (it was a foreclosure) she also said the current owners ran out of money (there are no appliances or counter tops) and they were going to rent to a friend , a single mother with 3 kids (it was withdrawn from the market saying they would rent to someone they knew) she said the house wants me there and not them and it will fall through she said I should drive down there and put some of my Inspiritstones and leave my energy there. Today I said? Yes today and try and talk to the owner...it was a 1.5 hr drive from Lambertville to Keyport, litterally one side of the state to the other! But when I got there there were two workers working on the house, I went in and looked for the owner but he wasnt around so I left my name and number with them and tried to expalin in my limited spanish that I wanted to buy it. I also left two inspiristones near the mail box.

I sent a text picture to myself, Mary and to Randy and said look the electic's hooked up...she answered me but he did not and I knew he was off that day. I went to the bay and walked the bulkhead and soaked up the late fall sunshine and tossed some Inspiristones in the bay. I wished I was hungry to go get a shrimp sandwich but I was not. I hung out awhile hoping he'd reply but he did not but my realtor called and we talked and he said he also would try to find out who the owner was and paitently listed to my tales from Marys "vision" weather he belived me or not. I then was getting ready to head home and Mary texted to see if I was going tio see Randy, no he didn't reply to me I said must be busy with his kids, I think not she texted u should text him tell him u r in town, he knows I sent him a picture of the house I said, but still you should see if he wants to meet u....No I said if he cant reach out to me some he can stay alone.........

Today I havent heard from him and I finally texted you mad at me........No......just wondering since you never replied to any of my messages........been keeping real busy he sent back..........and I let it go..........driving home tonight I prayed about it and my voice said: what if he's not the one .........(my card today had been soul mate) and I said then I will accept that you know best but he's the one I love he's the one that I want. I can't keep reaching out to him like he's a wounded puppy though, Mary said I should keep at it but I know that if I don't contact him he won't contact me....that in itself is enough to show me to back off. Yep that's the plan.....I am going to leave him be to live his life with his family......

Todd told me today he's started looking for an apartment, Brian is going to be out by the 1st....I called the township no one answered or returned my calls....all I know is I looked up my tax assesment and it 368 so they better not come in way lower than that or I am going to ask them why when they tax me it's worth that much but when they want to buy it it's worth XXX? I am just focusing on living in that house on Sunset Way...... I also had some concerns about Jeremy, he hasn't done a thing to find himself a place to live and he's so cranky that I wasnt able to tell him Todd's leaving too, he didnt take down the dumpster, he came home in the middle of work and with some suspicious looking guys........I asked my friend Dave why isnt God answering me on what to do about him and he said he thinks he did already and I am doupting it........oh letting go of a youngest child I think is the single most hardest thing to do, especially when they dont seem ready yet........*sigh*

This is truly a time of letting go.....of letting a love fly free and of pushing a baby bird out of the nest.........I hope they both come back to me but in different ways, the first I hope comes back someday to build a lifetime nest with me the latter I hope goes off and builds his own lifetime nest but flys over for a visit now and again to show me the chicks. Me... soon I will be off and I will be creating my own new little nest, and I can fill my new home with candles, and warm fresh baked cookies and stew in my crock pot and lots of love and friends.........and they will come, my sons will visit and I know that I am going to have a husband too someday soon....God promised me one it's the who just still isnt decided ........it has to be someone who will belive in me and us as much as I have belived in him........

Winter's coming, are you building your nest to keep you warm and safe though the cold winter's nights? Build it with love , build it with warmth and build it in faith..........they will come.......


With Love and in the Light, Cassie

Winter Birds